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NORTH CAROLINA (The Borowitz Report) – Flush with victory from yesterday’s statewide vote, supporters of North Carolina’s Amendment One today moved forward with a bold proposal to ban electricity and soap.

NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report) The following open letter to America was published today by former Pennsylvania Senator Rick Santorum:Now, some of you may recall that during the campaign, I took a slightly different position on Mitt Romney. In fact, I sai d that Mitt Romney was the worst person in America to run against Barack Obama for President

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report) –In the first term in office, President Barack Obama has broken with a tradition established over the previous eight years through his controversial use of complete sentences, political observers say.

NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report) – In what Romney campaign insiders are hailing as a sign that the party faithful are rallying around the former Massachusetts governor, a new poll released today shows that a majority of Republican voters agree with the state ment, “I guess I have to support fucking Romney

A film by Negin Farsad & Dean Obeidallah www.TheMuslimsAreComing.com Please help us finish this movie on Kickstarter! http://kck.st/HCWLnD @MuslimsRComing - ...

Every four years, the issue of women’s rights rises to the surface. The candidates and the media know it’s a hot-button issue. I think it should be on the front burner all the time. Now that it appears we have a Republican nominee, it might be good to lo ok at [...]

MOGADISHU (The Borowitz Report) – In yet another public relations setback for the beleaguered cruise industry, Somali pirates today said they would no longer board cruise ships, citing “unsafe working conditions.”

President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad addressed the United Nation's General Assembly. A new translation of his speech explains the real reason for delegates to leave...